Don't worry, I'm not actually going to write about appropriate spending habits and how they relate to your checking account. Perhaps that will be a topic for another day after some major retail therapy that will most likely be driven by some sort of emotional turmoil...but I digress.
What's the balance of your Emotional Bank Account? My Life Coach presented this concept to me the other day as I fell apart in her office mumbling through tears that I felt broken all over again and that I was tired of feeling emotionally drained from the pain of a broken heart. Last time I had a breakup it was much more traumatic and required a great deal of self reflection and effort in re-establishing my center of gravity. But this breakup was different. We didn't want the same things in life (much to my surprise and shock, hence the heartbreak). I don't need to retreat to Promises in Malibu to figure out how to get my life back on track after this most recent affair, but I did need some time to recover.
I posed a very poignant and reasonable question to my Life Coach: "When am I going to feel okay again?!?". Now my Life Coach knows my AAA type personality well enough to anticipate me asking for a neat little schedule and checklist to document my recovery process and have an end date in mind. More specifically, the exact day, hour, and minute when I will be completely healed and happy again. Is this really too much to ask of the person that I pay more per minute than you pay for your latte??
She asked me, "When would you like to feel better?" I responded with "Halloween". Why Halloween? I'm not too sure. It was a specific landmark and Thanksgiving sounded too far away. She then explained to me that my Emotional Bank Account has been drained. Let's just say it, I felt robbed! So now here I am at 28 years old and feeling completely broke. But the good news is that each days provides new deposit opportunities.
She told me, "Each day you will get to make a deposit. How much do you think you can deposit per day?" Naturally, as I like to consider myself a player in the Big Leagues, I told her that I can deposit $1,000 a day. "Ok, so to get to Halloween would give me a bank account balance of $42,000." Perfect! My starting salary out of college when I didn't have a care in the world and was blissfully happy. It was destiny. My new goal is to reach a bank account balance of $42,000. This sensible and structured solution was just what I needed and a sense of relief came over me.
Each day we are given new chances to enjoy life and make the most of the opportunities at hand. Some days are better than others and each emotional journey is filled with peaks and valleys. The first day after our session was great so I deposited $1,000 that night. Yesterday I had a run-in with the most recent Ex at a business function. Total nightmare. A couple glasses of red wine helped ease the pain, but they day was less than perfect none-the-less. I only deposited $750.
My Emotional Bank Account balance today is $1,750. Only $40,250 to go! I'm actually quite excited about this challenge and am holding on to each deposit slip as I am confident they will tell me a story when I am able to look back.
What is your bank account balance? I encourage you to track your deposits to remind yourself that some days are better then others, but more often then not, none of us are impoverished and we are all pretty well off in life.
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