Wednesday, June 13, 2012

WHEN DID WE STOP DREAMING?


Last week was one of those weeks...you know the kind when "Wednesday feels like Friday"?  I spend my days pursuing success and do my best to maintain a live work balance, but sometimes it is all a bit tiring. There are countless emails to return, dry cleaning piling up to the size of a small mountain in my closet, and expired food in the fridge begging to be thrown out and also serving as a reminder that I haven't made time to go to the grocery store in nearly two weeks.  The simple act of getting a haircut just doesn't seem to fit in between family events, work commitments, and the occasional extracurricular activity.  All that being said, I must also admit that I am actually quite grateful to feel that I have landed in a truly great place for someone not yet 30.  There is just something about this life that makes it all too easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle and never take a moment to hit the pause button for some time to simply be thoughtful.  It is something with which I have a very consistent love/hate relationship.

Midway through the week I resigned to my bedroom at a somewhat early hour of around 9:30 and watched an episode of Girls on my iPad before reaching for the lights.  For the record, I find Girls to be extremely smart and disarmingly accurate -- but I digress.  It was just past 10 when I lay down alone in my dark and quiet room and my mind began to wander, but instead of thinking about all the positive elements of such a peaceful evening I was drawn to things like a running to-do list and coming up with new solutions to old work problems.  It only took about three minutes for my mind to snap back and say "Can't I just prepare to start dreaming?"

It dawned on me that as a young girl I would look forward to bedtime because it allowed me to process a quiet moment and fill it with dreams for the future.  Today, as a not-so-young girl those quiet moments are filled with task lists and worrisome projects.  At what point did we stop dreaming??

I found myself caught in a moment where I felt the urge to hit the mental 'pause button' and use my heart to speak to my mind -- it was saying something along the lines of 'You can turn off now.  I got this.'  I spent the next moments before drifting to sleep thinking about what dreams I had as a child for myself as a young adult and what dreams I might have for my life in the near future.  I'm not sure I'm ready to fully disclose what those dreams are exactly, but I will say that I might have actually fallen asleep with a smile on my face.  Yes, a grown woman of nearly 30 years old smiling and drifting into dreams like a child.

We don't do it often enough and dreaming can be such a powerful emotion to enlighten our soul to the realm of possibilities in this big world.  I am talking about the possibilities that lie beyond our jobs, our family matters, and our relationships.  They are our hopes and dreams and they deserve a little acknowledgement sometimes.  Before you hit the lights tonight ask yourself what dreams you still have and then be encouraged that anything is possible.
 



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